Why I have begrudging respect for slay queens
12 months ago, 31 Dec 10:32
So, Kenya is once again playing catch up with Rwanda by imposing a ban on shisha. This shisha ban in my view was so badly timed - how can anyone ban such a money-making, fun-inducing, inhibition-releasing catalyst one day before the biggest party weekend of the year. I mean, many folks had lined up the girls, the music, the drinks and the shisha for the end of year partying weekend - only to have the shisha ban come in to mess things up. Anyway, if we are to believe social media, slay queens will be most affected by this ban. It seems that Shisha and slay queens are synonymous and they will be gnashing their teeth in fury following this ban. I must say I have a begrudging respect for slay queens - the real ones and even the fake ones who only have fleeting moments of glory. I admire their guts, their fierceness and they ability to ignore public attacks and vitriol. I am sure there are many young girls and women who dream of being slay queens. For these aspiring women, I wish to share some tips: You need to have the right looks; before embarking on the tough journey into the land of slay queens, one must make a full and realistic appraisal of their looks. This means assessing one’s face and determining it has the right colour, texture and terrain to attract lust and desire in person and in camera. Unless things change in the near future, aspiring slay queens are advised to have light (that is, yellow yellow), acne free skin. They are also advised to have lips that can give a perfect pout for the camera, breasts that are pert and sag free, flat tummies and behinds that have the right bump and curvature. In some rare instances, these looks can be gifts of nature. Yet where nature fails, one can allow intervention and purchase a few pills, pay for a few surgeries to ensure the right slay queen look is achieved. Invest in the hair; for reasons, I am yet to understand, I am told that hair is a big deal for current and aspiring slay queens. When I talk about hair, I do not mean natural, kinky hair. Slay queen hair must come in tonnage, not grammes, must come long not short and must sit on its owners head with pride. Slay queens I am told must don the right weaves and human hair, which can only be purchased in exotic destinations and which should cost a few hundred thousand shillings. If you want to slay the world, then you must have the hair for it. Slaying by social media; all investments to achieve the right slay queen must deliver the right level of return on social media. This means having killer Instagram and Twitter profiles and updates (I hear Facebook is really not the Slay Queen’s thing). The slay queen must ensure that her social media updates only reflect her good ...
Category: entertainment enews pulse